Lordy Lord, I hate watching romantic movies but I do love them. I hate watching because then it only makes me wish I had that. I'm such a hopeless romantic. It's so sad. Yeah I just watched Adam & Steve. It was a good movie... I wish I had a guy.
Anyway, I can keep those sob stories and thoughts to myself. Let me tell you about what I've been doing.
So yesterday, I stayed over in Atlantic City with my family and Monette. It was good times. We mainly boardwalked it. Yup. Went to the new Pier Shops area or whatever it's called. Some nice stores in there... there's an Apple Store! How awesome?! Haha, I'm such a dork. Well yeah we came back today and such and then we picked up Mariel and then headed to the movies to watch an effed up movie, Mr. Brooks. Hah it was good, but seriously crazy. I recommend it if you like thrillers/suspense/WEIRD movies. Like me. Hah.
So tomorrow I work from 10-4 and then after it's the Two Hearts thing at Sacred Heart. Yeah. I have to wear red.
Which brings me to the "I HATE BEING FAT" point of the entry. Haha. You knew it was coming. Ugh I really wish I was skinny. Maybe then I'd have a better chance to find someone. Whatever, I just need to keep on at it and really commit. I need to change before I go back to Boston. There are some hot guys in the city, LOL.
So after the movies, I hung out with Jackie. We went to the Burl Co Lib to watch the Swan Lake performance in the ampitheater... except it was moved inside for some reason? I didn't catch the reason why. But it was nice. Lots of elderly enjoying the two hot young guys and three hot girls. Haha. Yeah.
Then we hit up the DVDs and I got some movies, including Adam & Steve. I was lucky to find it. I'm adding it to my collection, if you know what I mean. Yeah. ;D
And then we headed to the Burlington Center, walked around for a couple, then went to Wawa for some F'REAL! milkshakes. YUM.
Sweet.
Damn I wish I was skinny.
Anyway, just a quick update before I head off to bed, I need sleep...
And I just wanted to say, I'm glad I'm working. No more of these really late nights (i.e. 4am) doing absolutely nothing. I have reason to sleep, haha, which is good. Working at the Q! really isn't that bad. I just wish I knew how much I was being paid, and when I'll be getting my first paycheck. Maybe I'll ask tomorrow. Yeah. And I definitely think I like the morning shift better than nighttime/close shift. Mmhmm.
Goodnight, I'm going to try and clean my room before I head to bed.
And I have another unrealistic "want." Leopard comes out in October, so I want to try and get a Mac over winter break of next year. Yeah I know, it'll never happen. I just wish.
I also need to keep in mind that I need to find a job in Boston, preferably a PHARMACY TECH job so I can start doing my internship hours - which reminds me I need to register... Bleh.
I'll leave you with the John Lennon song...
"Love is real, real is love,
Love is feeling, feeling love,
Love is wanting to be loved.
Love is touch, touch is love,
Love is reaching, reaching love,
Love is asking to be loved."
Goodnight!
Showing posts with label job. Show all posts
Showing posts with label job. Show all posts
Friday, June 15, 2007
Monday, June 4, 2007
So It's Monday Once Again
It's June 4th already! Wow has time flown by. My first day at Quizno's is tomorrow so wish me luck! I start at 8am because I have training. Hopefully whoever else is working tomorrow is cool. I met one girl today when I went in to give my papers. She was cool, I guess.
So I have to wear a hat see, but they ran out of hats and instead had visors... So I'm wearing a visor. And I took the visor thinking I'd look okay. However, I come home and yeah, my head is big... so the strap on the back of the hat is almost to the end! Haha. Plus my hair poofs up and is quite unflattering. Which leads me to...
Now I have a question: should I shave my head? I was thinking about it and maybe I should because I've always wanted to, just once in my life. However, I don't know what I'd look like so I never did. But now I'm thinking about doing it, possibly on Wednesday night. Any suggestions? Leave me a comment or message me.
Mmm, and now I just finished a great cup of hot cocoa but now I have to wash dishes. Hoorah. Not really.
Anyway I found another great artist on myspace. Her name is Priscilla Ahn and she is fab. Great indie folk music. Except I can't download her song Lullabye. It says you can download it but whatever I do the window doesn't open up so I can save it. Oh well. Go listen to her.
So tell me, should I shave my head? Because I think I'm really going to do it Wednesday.
Bye!
So I have to wear a hat see, but they ran out of hats and instead had visors... So I'm wearing a visor. And I took the visor thinking I'd look okay. However, I come home and yeah, my head is big... so the strap on the back of the hat is almost to the end! Haha. Plus my hair poofs up and is quite unflattering. Which leads me to...Now I have a question: should I shave my head? I was thinking about it and maybe I should because I've always wanted to, just once in my life. However, I don't know what I'd look like so I never did. But now I'm thinking about doing it, possibly on Wednesday night. Any suggestions? Leave me a comment or message me.
Mmm, and now I just finished a great cup of hot cocoa but now I have to wash dishes. Hoorah. Not really.
Anyway I found another great artist on myspace. Her name is Priscilla Ahn and she is fab. Great indie folk music. Except I can't download her song Lullabye. It says you can download it but whatever I do the window doesn't open up so I can save it. Oh well. Go listen to her.
So tell me, should I shave my head? Because I think I'm really going to do it Wednesday.
Bye!
Friday, May 25, 2007
It's Been 3 Weeks
Three weeks since I've been home. Wonderful. And I have done absolutely nothing. Expect maybe order my Med Term book. Which I haven't really opened yet. Ugh. Life sucks here.
It seems to be that my youtube craze is calming. But that's only because I have nothing to talk about. Or don't really want to talk about things for all to see, in my most vulnerable state. I want to talk about meaningful things, not just how my day was, and the rest of the video filled with silence and/or "ums." That sucks. I wouldn't want to watch a video like that. We will see. I want to record myself playing "The Luckiest" by Ben Folds and singing it if I can, but I haven't quite mastered the rhythm of the singing part to go along with the piano. Oh well.
Well I need a job. I cannot be staying at home in my tornado-strucken room. I've applied to many places. CVS has fucked me over, to say in the best way. Yeah. I could've gotten a position as a Pharm Tech at Deborah, however, they were looking for someone who was able to work year-round. Obviously I can't do that because I go to school in Boston. Yeah. So they hired someone else. Funny though, the lady told me 2 other applicants were in the same position as me, where they do not go to school in the area, but was applying for the Pharm Tech position. Oh well. I got an e-mail from Walgreens saying they were interested and junk, however, I've called the woman back twice already and left voicemails, and e-mailed back, but no response yet. And nothing back from Acme yet. I just applied to Walmart and Shoprite.
It seems that I've gotten so used to the taste of failure that I don't even care what happens to me in the future. Seriously, I'm fat, unemployed, and contribute nothing to the world. All I do is stress my family out, and take their money and eat their food. Why am I alive?
Thanks.
And I believe that everything is stemmed from that faithful day during senior year, the first day I ever deliberately cut school because it was the day after prom weekend. It was that day when I crashed my car and life spiraled down from there. I should've just gone home with Jackie and made everyone else smush into the other two cars. So since I didn't have a car, I didn't have a job the summer before I left for college. But then that's just my fault. Because why couldn't I just get a job where it was close enough to walk to... say Acme? Why? Why didn't I do it? Because I'm a fucking retard, that's why. Wonderful. So summer wasted. Yay.
Last summer, same reason. Didn't work. But again, why didn't I work at somewhere close? Again, because I'm a fucking retard. I see you're catching on to the pattern. Congrats to you. Instead I did the show with the Rancocas Interfaith Players, until the beginning of August.
I SUCK AT LIFE.
And now I feel that I am so behind everyone else, because during those times that I was dilly dallying and wasting time at home, sleeping, eating, getting fatter, everyone else was building their foundations for what they have - for what I wish I had now. Pharmacy technician positions at hospitals, pharmacies, wherever, where I'm stuck at ground zero. Woo.
This also goes back to my performance in high school. Why the hell did I slack so much? I could've gotten A's and had a job when I was in high school. It seems like high school was NOTHING compared to my college, which shouldn't have been. I only felt like it was because I simply procrastinated and slacked, mind you I did finish all my work. However, I feel like if I just did not slack, high school would have been a breeze. And then I could've found a job, even just for the weekends or something. Instead I was a fat slob of whom I still am, with no job experience whatsoever. I don't think newspaper carrier "paper boy" counts for anything.
And so I'm left with all these regrets and mistakes that I have made. It sucks that I have only grown up right now. After two years of college. After everyone has been there for years and I'm just arriving.
The only thing I can do now is just accept it and do whatever I can to catch up with the others. And to just swallow whatever life throws at me and just do it.
It seems to be that my youtube craze is calming. But that's only because I have nothing to talk about. Or don't really want to talk about things for all to see, in my most vulnerable state. I want to talk about meaningful things, not just how my day was, and the rest of the video filled with silence and/or "ums." That sucks. I wouldn't want to watch a video like that. We will see. I want to record myself playing "The Luckiest" by Ben Folds and singing it if I can, but I haven't quite mastered the rhythm of the singing part to go along with the piano. Oh well.
Well I need a job. I cannot be staying at home in my tornado-strucken room. I've applied to many places. CVS has fucked me over, to say in the best way. Yeah. I could've gotten a position as a Pharm Tech at Deborah, however, they were looking for someone who was able to work year-round. Obviously I can't do that because I go to school in Boston. Yeah. So they hired someone else. Funny though, the lady told me 2 other applicants were in the same position as me, where they do not go to school in the area, but was applying for the Pharm Tech position. Oh well. I got an e-mail from Walgreens saying they were interested and junk, however, I've called the woman back twice already and left voicemails, and e-mailed back, but no response yet. And nothing back from Acme yet. I just applied to Walmart and Shoprite.
It seems that I've gotten so used to the taste of failure that I don't even care what happens to me in the future. Seriously, I'm fat, unemployed, and contribute nothing to the world. All I do is stress my family out, and take their money and eat their food. Why am I alive?
Thanks.
And I believe that everything is stemmed from that faithful day during senior year, the first day I ever deliberately cut school because it was the day after prom weekend. It was that day when I crashed my car and life spiraled down from there. I should've just gone home with Jackie and made everyone else smush into the other two cars. So since I didn't have a car, I didn't have a job the summer before I left for college. But then that's just my fault. Because why couldn't I just get a job where it was close enough to walk to... say Acme? Why? Why didn't I do it? Because I'm a fucking retard, that's why. Wonderful. So summer wasted. Yay.
Last summer, same reason. Didn't work. But again, why didn't I work at somewhere close? Again, because I'm a fucking retard. I see you're catching on to the pattern. Congrats to you. Instead I did the show with the Rancocas Interfaith Players, until the beginning of August.
I SUCK AT LIFE.
And now I feel that I am so behind everyone else, because during those times that I was dilly dallying and wasting time at home, sleeping, eating, getting fatter, everyone else was building their foundations for what they have - for what I wish I had now. Pharmacy technician positions at hospitals, pharmacies, wherever, where I'm stuck at ground zero. Woo.
This also goes back to my performance in high school. Why the hell did I slack so much? I could've gotten A's and had a job when I was in high school. It seems like high school was NOTHING compared to my college, which shouldn't have been. I only felt like it was because I simply procrastinated and slacked, mind you I did finish all my work. However, I feel like if I just did not slack, high school would have been a breeze. And then I could've found a job, even just for the weekends or something. Instead I was a fat slob of whom I still am, with no job experience whatsoever. I don't think newspaper carrier "paper boy" counts for anything.
And so I'm left with all these regrets and mistakes that I have made. It sucks that I have only grown up right now. After two years of college. After everyone has been there for years and I'm just arriving.
The only thing I can do now is just accept it and do whatever I can to catch up with the others. And to just swallow whatever life throws at me and just do it.
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